When Should Twins Sleep Seperately?



Twins have this wonderful, unique bond starting in the womb that they share with each other for 9 months (usually less). They are used to having a foot in the ribs, or the eye or wherever it may land.

The reason I ask when you think twins should sleep separately is this:

Snuggling with my brother

Photo taken yesterday morning of the twins snuggling together.

Back in December I wrote about the twins being transitioned to their big boy toddler beds, since one of our 2 year old twins started doing acrobats to get out of the crib. We then gave them these cool race car beds. They each had separate cribs but slept together a lot when they were young, I’d say probably till around 5 months old.

How, you ask does this happen if they have their own beds?


Well, they go to sleep fine in their race cars and then the middle of the night wake up comes. They then go to the spare room queen bed with me in tow, and then the three of us go to sleep. Yes we get sleep. Something that is so important for all of us – especially those of us with rambunctious kids to chase and keep safe.

What I should do is return the first kid to their bed, but I am afraid of the crying or the struggle that might ensue, waking his brother. Then having two kids awake! So instead I let them sleep together in the Queen bed – with me.

I know this won’t last forever. I’ll enjoy the cuddles and the elbows to the head while I can. In the meantime I still psych myself up for working harder on this sleep issue and having fantastic, independent sleepers, in their very own beds.

Do you have great sleepers or are you dealing with an issue like me?

About Twin Mom

34 year old, born in a small steel town in South Africa, now living in a large Steel City in the US. Mother of twins and loving every moment.
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15 Responses to When Should Twins Sleep Seperately?

  1. rhonda says:

    I remember being the child who ran to my parents’ room during every thunderstorm. Me personally, I haven’t really had this problem with my children since they were babies, but this is a really good question. It seems that what’s most important is that everyone is getting rest. And I think it’s adorable (the elbows and cuddles) and it’s really just all up to the parent.

  2. OUPA says:

    They look so beautiful when curled up like that. Could eat them up.
    My children would love to come to our bed for a cuddle. Please enjoy while you can. They grow up soooo fast !

  3. I’m a tough love bedtime mommy — mostly because if I don’t get my sleep, I’ll be a grumpy daytime mommy (I think that is worse). I don’t have this problem…. but knowing you, you’ll handle bedtime wonderfully just like everything else you do! XO

  4. Christianna says:

    Someone usually lays down with E to get her to sleep. Once asleep, she’s usually good for the night. Sometimes she wakes up to call for one of us to “fix” her blankets. And, on rare occasions, like last night, she walks down to our room and asks to hop in bed with us. I don’t mind having her with us. She probably spent most nights in our room from 11 months till about 27 months. Now, we did have an air mattress at the end of the bed to transfer her to if we wanted… I think most nights, I was too lazy to move her. So, I enjoyed her snuggles. They know where their room is and where their beds are. I think sometimes, they just still want to enjoy some snuggles with mommy. I think that mid night wake ups and bed swapping and stuff is fine… Eventually, they’ll either sleep completely through the night, or simply not be interested in snuggling with each other. In either case, I think you can follow their lead.

  5. My boys used to be like that ( they are not twins but 2 yrs apart) and sometimes do try to sleep together with each other in 1 bed and I have to chase them back to their own beds as both of them would not get a good night’s sleep if they are sleeping together as they would hit/kick each other.

  6. Aww, so cute! Co-sleeping is fun though! But I can only imagine how crazy their sleeping positions get with the three of you in bed. We have a king bed and it does seem not enough for the three of us because they both sleep in weird positions. So my son and I sleep together, while Dad sleeps on the mattress next to us. 😀

    • Twin Mom says:

      Good to know I’m not alone with this – I had a feeling I wasn’t! Yes there are definitely crazy sleeping positions!

  7. Christy says:

    My sister’s who are twins slept in the same bed for a long time. My parents bought them bunk beds, the ones with the double bed on the bottom and twin on the top. I know that they were 5 or 6 years old before they slept separately.

  8. Sista says:

    I say GO WITH IT!!! No harm is done, and you all get a good night’s sleep. A grumpy Mummy or grumpy twins are NEVER NICE! As children we loved cuddles, didn’t we Sista, and there are a number of photos of us all in bed together Leigh :0) – I do think that they have a very strong bond, and I believe you should nurture it. I believe they will grow out of this stage in their lives, waking up in the middle of the night, and all 3 landing up in the same bed. I am a step-mum, and Peter and I had a double bed. When a child was ill, they always ended up in our bed, and Peter or I would end up in said child’s bed, as the bed was never big enough for all three. So we invested in a king size bed. The kids LOVE cuddles and would come through in the morning for cuddles, before going down for breakfast, it was priceless. They are teenagers now, and cuddles – yuck, get off me, I’m a teenager now. So Sista, enjoy your snuggles and cuddles while you can, and invest in a super king bed, all 4 of us fit perfectly – as snug as a bug in a rug ;0)

  9. Cody says:

    Such a sweet pic. Bedtime is such a tough one! C has mostly been a great sleeper so far, but on the nights when she’s not, we definitely do what we can to survive. If your current situation works for you, I say ride it out until it doesn’t. It’s not like they will sleep with you when they are teenagers! Good luck, mama :)

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